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The Nice Ass, Chapter 19

“So was she good?” Casey asked, in a restaurant full of people. “In bed, I mean.”Lenny’s jaw dropped, but mine stayed put. I was too busy analyzing the inflection in her voice to be disturbed by Casey’s direct question. I think there was a hint of jealousy in it. I looked her in the eyes and replied in a matter-of-fact voice.
“I can honestly say that she was the best I’ve had.” Lenny’s jaw dropped even further. “She knew what she liked and wasn’t afraid to tell me. She also was quick to find out what I liked and exploit that. I’d say it was a pretty good match up.”
Casey looked at me without speaking for close to ten seconds, a hint of expectation in her eyes. I knew what she wanted to hear, but I wanted to make her wait for it.
“You’re a solid second place, though,” I winked.
“I think your memory has been dulled with the passage of time,” she said. “Surely I’d be first if you recalled all the details.”
“Well, you’re welcome to remind me sometime.”
“That’s it,” Lenny slammed his hand on the table. “I don’t want to think about either of you naked, especially not with each other. Let’s just talk about sports or something.”
“I’m sorry, Lenny.” Casey patted him on the back, but she maintained eye contact with me for longer than usual. Was I reading too much into this? Was she thinking of giving us another try? And if she was, how did I feel about that? I didn’t have time for those questions at that moment, though.
“Yeah, sorry about that,” I said. “Sometimes my mouth just takes over without me thinking about it.”
“Yes it does,” Casey grinned. “And I remember those occasions very well. Oops, sorry, Lenny. I couldn’t help myself.”
“So what about the other girl? Mary?” Lenny changed the subject.
“Well, she’s pissed at me because I called her ‘thicker than the average Stuckey-chick,'” I shrugged. “I can see where she draws the unflattering conclusion, but it’s not what I meant at all.”
“Your mouth taking over without your consent yet again,” Casey laughed. “Yes, Ben, you really do need to watch how you phrase things around girls. We like to deconstruct every sentence.”
“Yeah,” I said. “She said she wanted some time to sort it out, but I don’t think there will be a second chance with her. I feel pretty awful about it, especially because she was so great.”
“She was the one you called me about, right?” Casey asked.
“Yeah,” I nodded. “But on the bright side, it narrows the playing field and I can focus on the other two. Diane is already asking me about how many other girls I’m seeing.”
“Red flag!” Lenny said. “That was your first date and she’s already got plans on tying you down? Run away, man.”
“She counts it as our fourth,” I said. “And funny you should mention tying down. She’s got this tattoo on…”
“Number Four?” Our waiter had appeared, delivering our orders. After a minute of plate-shuffling, we picked up the conversation between mouthfuls of food.
“So she’s got a tattoo of what?” Lenny asked.
“It’s not important, really,” I said. I didn’t want to air out Diane’s business with people she hadn’t even met yet.
“You said ‘other two’ earlier,” Casey said. “Diane is one, but who is the other?”
“Oh, her name is Kara,” I said. “She and I are having a double-date with Lenny and her roommate this weekend.”
“First date?” Casey asked.
“Yeah,” I nodded. “I decided to follow Lenny’s advice and not focus on just one yet, and then the whole double-date thing popped up and I couldn’t let Lenny down.”
“Appreciated,” Lenny said, around a burrito.
“So, and I’m going to regret asking this, but I told her I would,” Casey said. “Are you going to ask out Rachel?”
“I hadn’t really considered it, Case,” I said. “You don’t usually warn me about girls, so I guess that struck me as a warning sign. Don’t get me wrong, though. She’s cool, and cute, and it’d probably be fun if nothing else.”
“That’s true,” Casey said. “And she gets your jokes and can hold her own in a sarcasm contest.”
“So I guess we just talked me into asking her out,” I laughed. “I’ll just go into it with the knowledge that she’s dangerous. No marriage proposal for at least four months.”
“I wasn’t trying to convince you,” Casey said. “But I have to admit the two of you click very well. I don’t want to keep you from seeing for yourself.”
“So when are you going to set me up with a hottie, Casey?” Lenny asked. “Stuck isn’t the only single guy looking for love, you know?”
“Maybe I can set you up with Rachel once she’s done gutting Ben.” Casey smiled as she looked at me. It was a sad smile. What had I gotten myself into?

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